The Car Ride Home
Am I the only one who has no idea what to say on the car ride home from a game?
The car ride home is a more private setting for parents to talk to their children, which means it may be a great place for parents and children to bond... but also means it may be a place that is extremely terrifying for parents wondering, “what exactly am I supposed to say here?” The purpose of this article is to explore the conversation that happens during the car ride home from a game between parents and their child.
The intention of this article is to try and give you some tips and tricks on what to say on the daunting car ride home. Young athletes shared what they felt was helpful to avoid what they usually dreaded on the car ride home. This article provides insight as to what your athlete might be thinking about, so that you can attempt understand what your child is thinking and approach the car ride home a little differently.
This article gives clarity (finally!) by giving practical tips on what to say during the car ride home. Feedback, while necessary to fix mistakes, can sometimes make the athlete feel like they want the car ride to end. It’s important to be mindful of your child’s mood when attempting to give suggestions. Also, make sure your child is a part of the conversation and not just passively ‘listening’ to everything you’re saying. They probably want to talk about their sports too, but they want it to be a two-way conversation where they can give their opinions too!
PRESS PAUSE:
Take a second to reflect on your opinions and feelings about the car ride home.
PONDER:
How does this make you think about what your conversation normally looks like on the car ride home?
PRACTICE:
The car ride home is a great opportunity for you to strengthen your relationship with your child, so try to use these tips to have the car ride end in two smiling faces instead of animosity because you accidentally said the ‘wrong’ thing.
Check in on your child. You probably know them better than anyone else, so when you hop in the car do a check in with them to see how they are feeling and if they are in a place where they can receive any feedback you might have for them. If they’re not in the best of moods, maybe use this opportunity to change the subject or get some ice cream. If they are in a good place, tell them what you noticed! Athletes need feedback to know what they did wrong and giving suggestions is necessary for their improvement.
Make sure the conversation is a two-way street. I know as a parent it’s easy to feel obligated to always be giving the advice, but your children want to be a part of the conversation! Try to actively ask questions about their thoughts and opinions, this way they’ll be more engaged in the conversation.
Article Citation: Tamminen, K. A., Poucher, Z, A., & Povilaitis, V. (2017). The car ride home: An interpretive examination of parent-athlete sport conversations. Sport, Exercise, and Performance Psychology, 6(4), 325-339. https://doi.org/10.1037/spy0000093